给你几个短笑话
1.A man is talking to God.
The man:"God,how long is a million years?"
God:"To me,it's about a minute."
The man:"God,how much is a million dollars?"
God:"To me it's a penny."
The man:"God,may I have a penny?"
God:"Wait a minute."
一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.
他问:"主啊,一百万美元对你意味着多少?"
上帝回答:"一便士."
男子又问:"那一百万年呢?"
上帝说:"一秒钟."
最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"
上帝回答:"过一秒钟."
2.Secret For a Long Life
A woman walks up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch.
"I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she says."What's your secret for a long,happy life?"
"I smoke three packs a day,drink a case of whiskey a week,eat fatty foods and never,ever exercise."
"Wow,that's amazing," says the woman."How old are you?"
"Twenty-six."
长寿秘诀
一位女士走向坐在门廊的椅子上摇动的小老头.
“我无意中发现,你是多么幸福,”那女士说.“你幸福而长寿的秘密是什么?”
“我每天抽三包烟,每周喝一箱威士忌,吃高脂肪食品,而且从来不曾锻炼.”
“哦,真神奇,”女士说.“你高寿?”
“26”
3.Little Robert asked his mother for tow cents.”What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?”
“I gave it to a poor old woman,”he answered.
“You’er a good boy,”said the mother proudly.”Here are tow cents more.But why are you so interested in the old woman?”
“She is the one who sells the candy.”
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱.
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆.”他回答说.“你真是一个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说.“再给你两分钱.可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”
“她是个卖糖果的.”
4.Teacher:Here are two birds,one is a swallow,the other is sparrow.Now who can tell us which is which?
Student:I cannot point out but I know the answer.
Teacher:Please tell us.
Student:The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.
两只鸟
老师：这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀.谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗?
学生：我指不出,但我知道答案.
老师：请说说看.
学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子
5.Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked,”What happened?”
“A kid bit me,”replied Ivan.
“Would you recognize him if you sew him again?”asked his mother.
“I’d know him any where,”said Ivan.”I have his ear in my pocket.”
他的耳朵在我的衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里.他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?”
“一个男孩咬了我一口.”伊凡说.
“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问.
“他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说,“他的耳朵还在我的衣兜里.” 给你几个短笑话
1.A man is talking to God.
The man:"God,how long is a million years?"
God:"To me,it's about a minute."
The man:"God,how much is a million dollars?"
God:"To me it's a penny."
The man:"God,may I have a penny?"
God:"Wait a minute."
一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.
他问:"主啊,一百万美元对你意味着多少?"
上帝回答:"一便士."
男子又问:"那一百万年呢?"
上帝说:"一秒钟."
最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"
上帝回答:"过一秒钟."
2.Secret For a Long Life
A woman walks up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch.
"I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she says."What's your secret for a long,happy life?"
"I smoke three packs a day,drink a case of whiskey a week,eat fatty foods and never,ever exercise."
"Wow,that's amazing," says the woman."How old are you?"
"Twenty-six."
长寿秘诀
一位女士走向坐在门廊的椅子上摇动的小老头.
“我无意中发现,你是多么幸福,”那女士说.“你幸福而长寿的秘密是什么?”
“我每天抽三包烟,每周喝一箱威士忌,吃高脂肪食品,而且从来不曾锻炼.”
“哦,真神奇,”女士说.“你高寿?”
“26”
3.Little Robert asked his mother for tow cents.”What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?”
“I gave it to a poor old woman,”he answered.
“You’er a good boy,”said the mother proudly.”Here are tow cents more.But why are you so interested in the old woman?”
“She is the one who sells the candy.”
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱.
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆.”他回答说.“你真是一个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说.“再给你两分钱.可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”
“她是个卖糖果的.”
4.Teacher:Here are two birds,one is a swallow,the other is sparrow.Now who can tell us which is which?
Student:I cannot point out but I know the answer.
Teacher:Please tell us.
Student:The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.
两只鸟
老师：这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀.谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗?
学生：我指不出,但我知道答案.
老师：请说说看.
学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子
5.Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked,”What happened?”
“A kid bit me,”replied Ivan.
“Would you recognize him if you sew him again?”asked his mother.
“I’d know him any where,”said Ivan.”I have his ear in my pocket.”
他的耳朵在我的衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里.他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?”
“一个男孩咬了我一口.”伊凡说.
“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问.
“他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说,“他的耳朵还在我的衣兜里.”