It is a fine day. Having prepared for a picnic,we drove into the country and found a quiet spot . The moment we descended from our car,we unpacked our hampers and sat around.
There were a few wasps near us . Then a great many wasps gathered, after which we made our efforts to drive them away.Suddenly,I saw a wasp nest in a tree nearby, we seized our things and returned to our car as soon as we could.Pursued by wasps,we drove away.总体不错,用了不少难句,这个是加分的,但是叙述中then,after等用的太多,完全就是一种记叙,这样不太好.连词尽量少出现. It is a fine day. Having prepared for a picnic,we drove into the country and found a quiet spot . The moment we descended from our car,we unpacked our hampers and sat around.
There were a few wasps near us . Then a great many wasps gathered, after which we made our efforts to drive them away.Suddenly,I saw a wasp nest in a tree nearby, we seized our things and returned to our car as soon as we could.Pursued by wasps,we drove away.总体不错,用了不少难句,这个是加分的,但是叙述中then,after等用的太多,完全就是一种记叙,这样不太好.连词尽量少出现.