Everybody knows*,the students *like it’s a good idea that they play computer games in vacation.The reasons are as the following:
1.Play* computer games can *dispatch for a long time.
2.The compter games *is interesting.
Many people think that *play computer games will hurt the students*.The reasons are as the following:
1.Play* computer games will *injure the student’s eyes.They will have *myopia.
2.Play* computer games can come into* contact* with bad things.
3.The students play computer games for a long time.*The will *cquire *network addiction.
4.Play* computer games can waste the *study.
I think that the students *can’t play the computer games,because the student’s first thing *that must learn knowledge.
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Everybody knows the students think it’s a good idea to play computer games during vacation.The reasons are listed as the following:
1.Playing computer games is a good way to pass time.
2.The compter games are interesting.
Many people think that play computer games will hurt the students.The reasons are listed as the following:
1.Playing computer games will hurt the student’s eyes.They will become near-sighted.
2.Students can be traped into commiting bad things.
3.As students playing computer games for a long time,they will be addicted to games.
4.Playing computer games can waste the time which should have been spent on studying.
I think that the students shouldn't play the computer games,because the student’s first mission is to gain knowledge.
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Review:
The writer have a basic skill in writing.
Despite some noticable spelling and grammatical errors,it's not difficult for readers to follow the ideas and writer's critical thinking capacity is reflected in the outline.
With a little bit dissatisfaction,the 3rd point in the negative side,more specific explanation or examples could be added to make the idea of "bad things" more clear. Everybody knows*,the students *like it’s a good idea that they play computer games in vacation.The reasons are as the following:
1.Play* computer games can *dispatch for a long time.
2.The compter games *is interesting.
Many people think that *play computer games will hurt the students*.The reasons are as the following:
1.Play* computer games will *injure the student’s eyes.They will have *myopia.
2.Play* computer games can come into* contact* with bad things.
3.The students play computer games for a long time.*The will *cquire *network addiction.
4.Play* computer games can waste the *study.
I think that the students *can’t play the computer games,because the student’s first thing *that must learn knowledge.
-----
Everybody knows the students think it’s a good idea to play computer games during vacation.The reasons are listed as the following:
1.Playing computer games is a good way to pass time.
2.The compter games are interesting.
Many people think that play computer games will hurt the students.The reasons are listed as the following:
1.Playing computer games will hurt the student’s eyes.They will become near-sighted.
2.Students can be traped into commiting bad things.
3.As students playing computer games for a long time,they will be addicted to games.
4.Playing computer games can waste the time which should have been spent on studying.
I think that the students shouldn't play the computer games,because the student’s first mission is to gain knowledge.
------
Review:
The writer have a basic skill in writing.
Despite some noticable spelling and grammatical errors,it's not difficult for readers to follow the ideas and writer's critical thinking capacity is reflected in the outline.
With a little bit dissatisfaction,the 3rd point in the negative side,more specific explanation or examples could be added to make the idea of "bad things" more clear.